


we're burning up

by kleine_waldfee



Series: money power glory [1]
Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Adultery, Alcohol, Emotionally constipated characters, Exhibitionism (kind of), Gun Violence, Gun play, M/M, Murder, Organized Crime, Power Imbalance, Prostitution, Sex, Unhealthy Relationships, dom/sub elements, is it bad that im only now realizing how terrible this is?, mention of drugs
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-13
Updated: 2019-04-13
Packaged: 2020-01-12 20:40:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18454238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kleine_waldfee/pseuds/kleine_waldfee
Summary: Had Mingi been a child, San would be one of his old, well-used toys while Yeosang would be the new shiny toy that was the center of attention.





	we're burning up

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE, and I cannot stress this enough, read the tags carefully. This is not a story about nice people. A lot of this is morally questionable or just wrong. Remember to practice self care before, during and after reading!
> 
> (title from "like heaven" by zolita)

He loves me, he loves me not, you would repeat in your head as you continued ripping petals of whatever flower you could find out. He loves me, he loves me not, until all there was left was a bare stem and an answer.

San stared at the artfully painted vase in front of him. It contained various kinds of flowers he didn't care to name. His fingers twitched. He wanted to pick one of them out and play this mindless game. Not to find an answer, that would be too childish and he wasn't drunk enough for that. No, it would simply be a way to satisfy his urge to destroy something beautiful.

The meeting room he was sulking in had long emptied out, ice cubes in the half finished glasses filled with amber drinks liquifying. He thought it was safe to say that using flowers as decoration to please the most dangerous men of the country was an oddity. 

San sighed and rested his head in the palm of his hand. He felt weirdly dramatic doing so. Maybe he should get another drink. It was the end of the work day, after all.

Mingi had a weakness for beautiful things. That's why the fucking flowers were here. San thought it to be peculiar. It's not like all the ugliness could be made up for with something as banal as flowers. But Mingi was a neoplatonic idealist who was in love with all the beauty and perfection this world had to offer.

Perhaps that is why he had hired Yeosang. San lifted his short glass to his lips and swallowed the burning liquid all at once.

*

San was going to confront him. That was better than bottling your feelings up. At least that is what his mother had taught him.

Mingi's door opened just when he got there. Yeosang bowed his head dutifully as he passed by San. He knew it was meant to be respectful, but the action felt more belittling than anything else. He put on his poker face and ignored the other man.

He knocked sharply and waited until he heard a muffled "come in". Mingi was leaning on the windowsill as he smoked a cigarette, perfectly dressed. He looked like one of those models you would usually encounter in high fashion magazines.

"I didn't know cigarettes after were your thing," San said in lieu of a greeting. 

Mingi turned around. One of his eyebrows was lifted. That was the only hint of emotion San could decipher on his face. "What do you mean to tell me?"

"I want you to stop messing around with Yeosang." San was surprised his voice sounded as stable as it did. On the inside, he was burning with rage. They had never officially claimed that the kind of relationship they had was an exclusive one, but San had started feeling left out.

Had Mingi been a child, San would be one of his old, well-used toys while Yeosang would be the new shiny toy that was the center of attention.

"You want what?" Mingi barked out a laugh. "It's bold of you to demand something from me like that. You shouldn't forget your place." 

Feeling safe around a mob boss was probably a contradiction in itself, but that is how San usually felt in Mingi's presence. Now he was starting to feel uncomfortably small. Mingi had made him his right-hand man, but he could just as easily be replaced, which would most likely not end well for San. If he was lucky Mingi might decide to put him in a lower rank instead of offing him. 

Mingi normally didn't make him feel the discrepancy between them, but now it hit San like a punch in the gut. No matter how much power Mingi gave him, they would never be on an equal level. 

He looked to the ground as he uttered, "I'm sorry. It won't happen again. You can do whatever - whoever - you please. I just wish it would be me."

"Oh, San," Mingi sighed and closed the distance between them. He lifted San's chin and looked him in the eye as he said, "I'll never not want you." He proceeded to press a chaste kiss to San's lips. It was like pouring gas into the flames that were already burning inside of San.

He tried to chase after Mingi's mouth as he retreated, but the man stepped away. "I have some stuff to take care of."

San got the hint and left, taking his hunger with him.

*

Sipping on his rum on the rocks, San let his gaze wander over the club. He could feel the vibrations of the bass in his bones.

The dancefloor didn't look all that inviting. Sweaty bodies grinding against each other. San preferred the simplicity the VIP area had to offer. The sleek leather he was sitting on and the low tables made for a luxurious atmosphere. 

Mingi was sitting across from him, Yeosang glued to his side. San started a conversation with the pretty woman sitting close to him and did his best to direct all of his attention towards her. That night, Mingi had not once demeaned himself to speak to or even look at San. 

San was in it to forget and ignore. 

However, he did not miss the way Mingi grabbed Yeosang's hand and pulled him up. Out of the corner of his eyes he could see them walking towards the restrooms. San knew for a fact that the services of an escort like Yeosang were expensive, but if someone had asked him to describe the man, the first adjective he would utter would be "cheap".

*

"It's payday," Mingi said, circling the man who was tied to a wooden chair menacingly. He looked like a predator. San found it awfully attractive.

Pulling on the ropes was of no use for the man. San was good with his hands. The knots would not come loose, no matter how hard he tried. 

"I'll give you all the money for the drugs. Please, give me more time," the man pleaded frustratedly. 

Mingi came to a halt in front of the man and squatted so that he could look him in the eye. He clicked his tongue and said, "That is not what I meant. You and I both know what I'm talking about, there is no point in acting dumb."

Seonghwa stepped forward and handed Mingi his Glock after he had given him the signal. "You know I can deal with a delay in payment. What I'm allergic to is people who break my trust by changing loyalties."

San could see the guilt and fear in the man's eyes before Mingi pulled the trigger. It was a mess. As always, San was glad he wasn't the one who had to clean it up.

*

Mingi bought a new oil painting for the living room. It depicted flowers in obsessive detail. Naturally, San hated it. 

One beautiful thing for one sin - it did not work like that. San knew he had booked a one-way ticket to hell by working for Mingi, there was no need to cover up the ugliness that came with it. 

To some extent, San could see why Mingi had a taste for exquisite things, though. Why wouldn't he? After all, they were swimming in enough money to call this a sustainable way of living. And while San did not understand Mingi's obsession with beauty, he did understand the feeling of doing things simply because you could.

*

Yeosang was devastatingly beautiful and even though San did see why Mingi had hired him, he could not grasp it. There had to be something magical about him if Mingi was this invested in him and San had made it his mission to find out what it was.

Mingi was out of town for a day and Yeosang had stuck around, so San had requested to spend the evening with him. It felt weird to him at first. If Yeosang caught onto any of the jealousy or awkwardness he did not show it. 

San was surprised to learn that Yeosang was not only extraordinarily beautiful, but also awfully cute, all while effortlessly keeping the conversation flowing with witty remarks and a sharp tongue. 

It was getting late when San asked, "Can I kiss you?" The question came out of the blue for them both.

The other man was clearly shocked. "I didn't know you had that sort of interest in me."

"I've only gained it recently. I want to see what you're capable of."

Yeosang raised an eyebrow and inquired, "What about Mingi?"

Shrugging, San replied, "Well, he's not here."

Yeosang started at him intensely for an awfully long moment. He must have been satisfied with whatever it was he found in San's eyes because he leaned forward and pressed an enchantingly sweet kiss to his lips. 

"I really can't read you," he uttered as San left open mouthed kisses on his jaw and his neck.

"Good thing that's not what you're paid for, then," San whispered in his ear. He took the lobe between his teeth. 

Yeosang gasped when San bit down. "Are you doing this to take revenge?"

"Would you care if I was?" 

Now Yeosang peeled himself out of San's grip. He got up and fixed his clothes, said, "I'm a business man. What do you think?" He looked at San with a shy smile before he went to the stairs. He turned around. "Are you coming or what?"

*

Yeosang's lips were silky like rose petals. He was soft and managed to look innocent even while taking cock. The softest sounds fell from his open mouth. He looked genuinely blissed out and San thought that boy was worth his money.

He was a stark contrast to San. San was not beautiful, at least not in the way Yeosang was. San came with harsh edges and the instinct of a killer. He loved playing dangerous games. Slowly, he was beginning to understand why Mingi liked the presence of angelic Yeosang.

He dug his fingers into the flesh of Yeosang's thigh harder and started sucking on his collarbone harshly. His goal was to destroy the illusion of perfection. He knew it must be bordering on painful, but Yeosang did not show any signs of discomfort. In fact, he suddenly sounded more desperate.

San pressed his thumb against Yeosang's wet lips and was pleasantly surprised when he immediately took the digit in his mouth and sucked on it lazily. Yeosang looked at him with glassy eyes and grabbed San's biceps tightly as he came. It was exhilarating. 

*

San was laughing at something Yeosang had said. After the incident some sort of camaraderie had developed between them. It felt better than the jealousy and the disgust. 

When their laughter died down he noticed Mingi looking at him from across the room. His gaze was unreadable and stiff. When he lowered his shot glass after knocking its contents back, San caught a glance of the fire burning in his eyes. 

San smirked and wrapped his arm around Yeosang's shoulders in a friendly way. He ignored Mingi, but he was sure he was still observing the two. San wanted him to eat it up and choke on it.

*

"Why did you order me to come here," San asked coolly as he entered Mingi's office a couple days later. 

"Oh, San," Mingi replied, sounding just as cold. He leaned back in his chair and positioned his elbows on the armrests. "You know I like you because you're smart. Don't act stupid."

San ignored the remark and conversationally stated, "I noticed Yeosang isn't around anymore."

Mingi got up and stepped around the table, coming to a halt in front of San. He leaned back against the desk, resting his hands on the sleek wood. San didn't miss the gun that was strategically placed next to Mingi's right hand. "I don't want your sloppy seconds."

So touching Yeosang had made the man undesirable for Mingi. San felt a twisted sense of pride washing over him. 

"You know," Mingi continued since San didn't give him an answer, "between the two of you it was never him that was the whore."

San's breathing hitched when Mingi was suddenly in his face. They hadn't been this close in a while. Despite understanding the severity of the situation, San couldn't help but want Mingi closer. He wanted more of whatever the man was willing to give him. He looked at Mingi and hoped he would understand.

Mingi pulled at San's hair and bared his throat. "You disrespected me. I don't think you remember who I am. What should I do with you?"

San gasped when he felt Mingi's hot breath on his skin. He kissed his cheeks, his jaw, his neck. He didn't kiss San where he wanted it the most. Loneliness burned on his lips. Mingi's hands slid down his torso, to the front of his pants. San was embarrassingly hard.

"On your knees," Mingi ordered. 

San glanced at the open door. At this time, there were not many people around, but it still worried him for a second. Mingi followed his gaze and said, "Are you worried someone will see? I don't think that's something little whores get embarrassed about." Mingi pulled San closer by the collar and whispered, "Everybody's allowed to see who's in charge."

San knew the game and was willing to play it. He slid out of his seat and positioned himself on his knees in front of Mingi. Neither of them did anything for a while, so he looked at the man expectantly. 

He looked at him with a soft expression as he caressed San's cheek. "What's your colour, baby?"

San leaned into the touch. "Green."

Mingi's expression darkened again and he slapped San where he had lovingly placed his hand before. "Then what are you waiting for?"

"Sorry, Sir," he uttered as he undid Mingi's pants. Both his face and his desire were burning bright. 

He loved every second. It was a privilege, he thought, as he tasted the man who had denied him every sort of affection or intimacy for weeks. 

His eyes landed on the gun behind Mingi again. It was his beloved Glock. Mingi noticed immediately and took it in his hand, weighed it indecisively. "Lick it," Mingi requested eventually and held it in front of San's face. 

San's heart was beating wildly in his ribcage as his tongue met the cool barrel. He looked up at Mingi and wrapped his lips around it. Adrenaline shot through his veins like a drug. Mingi's eyes were dark as he pressed the gun to San's head instead.

"Your colour," he wanted to know. 

"Green," San answered truthfully. He sounded wrecked. 

Mingi nodded and said, "You may continue."

The feeling of the weapon pressed to San's head made him pleasure Mingi more enthusiastically. The danger made him feel drunk and light-headed. The most precious thing his parents had given him was his life. He would allow Mingi to take it. God, he would give this man anything he asked for.

Being at Mingi's mercy was exhilarating. San blew him like he was going to die if he didn't have Mingi's come down his throat within the next minute.

Objectively, sucking cock with a gun to your head was terrifying. Subjectively, it made San feel special. He was here, not Yeosang, not anybody else. He was finally allowed in Mingi's personal space again and he was so happy about it he started crying. 

"You look so beautiful, baby," Mingi whispered to him and started wiping at his tear-stricken face with his free hand. San believed him and this time there was no urge to destroy. Mingi had wrecked him well enough.

When it was over, Mingi finally leaned in and kissed San on his swollen lips. San melted into the touch like wax holding together wings melted if you got too close to the sun. I love you, he thought. He swallowed the words before he could make a fool of himself.

"I didn't mean to hurt you," Mingi said while they just stood in the middle of the office, hugging. 

"You didn't," San replied. "You know I love when you're rough."

Mingi frowned. "You know that's not what I meant. I just really didn't expect that to make you feel this way."

San ignored both the statement and its implications and instead said, "I'm tired. Can we go home?"

*

Falling into the deep, open water was a risk San was more than willing to take in order to feel the apocalyptic heat of the sun.

**Author's Note:**

> Fun fact this wasn't going to be my first Ateez fic, I've been working on something else for a while now, but this literally slapped me in the face and yelled "write me". I swear officer the next one is gonna be more wholesome.
> 
> Btw, comments are love and life, feel free to tell me everything you liked and disliked :)


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